The math behind how (Mitt) Romney can give everyone a 20 percent tax cut without bankrupting the government is just way too advanced for us regular folks to understand. It’s unfathomably complex, like string theory. You’d have to grasp that the universe is actually eleven co-existent dimensions — eight of which are where Romney shelters his wealth.


bulldog on trampoline [video]


Posting because 1) I’m not one of the 16 million people who have already seen this, and 2) of all the possible copyright violations of this song, this one is the best by far.

I know at this point many of you are expecting me to go after my likely opponent, Newt Gingrich.

… I understand Governor Romney was so incensed (by my appearance on Jimmy Fallon’s show) he asked his staff if he could get equal time on the ‘Merv Griffin Show.’

… Four years ago, I was locked in a brutal primary battle with Hillary Clinton. Four years later, she won’t stop drunk-texting me from Cartagena.”

… What’s the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull? A pit bull is delicious.



“…the white people don’t seem very happy for them.”

PS: Those are seriously, like, for real, shots from an actual Santorum ad.

“I’m Rick Santorum, and I facepalmed this message.”

I’m Rick Santorum, and I faceplamed this messag

(Source: rambutan)